In these (semi-regular) posts, I share five things.
Loves, hates, ideas I’m pondering, places I’m supporting, whatever.
This week is quarantine focused, since we’re in lockdown due to COVID19. Stay safe, guys!
Here we go:
CHANGE I’VE BEEN FORCED TO MAKE
I’ve smashed my phone, yet again, and since I can’t go and get it replaced as I normally would, I’m using a spare old phone. It has hardly any apps on it at all – no work emails, no social media – and I’m deliberately not installing those things.
The result, unsurprisingly, is that I’m spending much less time on my phone. I also can’t get my AirPods to work with the phone (probably because it’s older), and I don’t have other headphones, so I’m not listening to podcasts while I walk.
I’m actually enjoying hearing the birds sing while I walk, and since there’s nothing much on my phone, there’s no reason to pick it up and scroll. So this is a good change!
CHANGE I’VE DECIDED TO MAKE
I’m putting my writing on hold until the lockdown ends.
In the law firm, we’ve furloughed all of the team which means I’m doing everything at work; all of the work on our ongoing cases, answering all the incoming calls and getting new work in, even handling accounts. Then there are the government’s financial help offerings which are hugely appreciated, but each one has obviously taken some time to apply for.
That’s taking pretty much full-time hours for me at the moment, split over a couple of shifts through the day, and add to that the fact that right now, my daughter needs me at home as much as possible. She’s having a tough time, and if I’m writing as well, it’s more time away from her. Right now, that just isn’t fair.
I’m feeling pretty relaxed about this decision, it’s the right thing to do.
OTHER CHANGE I’VE DECIDED TO MAKE
My daughter will be returning to school one day a week from next week.
I hesitate to write this, because I’m sure some people will judge, but ultimately nobody knows a situation unless they live it, and this is what’s right for us.
Of course we have to be sensible and minimise the COVID19 risks. I take all of that seriously, I really do. But I think we have to remember that every death is a tragedy, and I really worry for the mental health effects that lockdown will have on certain people and vulnerable groups. Will we see a spike in suicides? We’ve already seen some lives lost to domestic violence and I’m not sure the lockdown message was clear enough initially in terms of people needing to leave their houses if they were in danger. Apparently, that’s changed now. I’m still not watching the news so I don’t know.
But while some people will be able to stay home and get through the lockdown with minimal disruption or consequence, there are other people who may not survive the lockdown period. And then there are people who may survive, but who may suffer long-term impacts on their mental health.
I’m certainly not suggesting that there’s a suicide risk in my house, by the way. But I know there will be in some other houses.
And I guess I hope we can all respect that the majority of people are making the decision that’s right for them and their unique situation.
BOOKS I’M READING
I’ve gone back to J D Kirk’s crime thriller series this week, and they’re a joy to read.
I read book one recently and this last week I’ve read book two and moved straight away on to book three. These books really are excellent.
COVID19 SURVIVAL STRATEGY
It’s getting harder week by week, day by day.
I’ve found that some days I don’t want any part of the group chats where people are sharing funny lockdown memes, and I’ve felt a lot of anger about this situation.
In a strange way, when the sun disappeared this week and the rain came, it was a relief to me. Also, my daughter’s behaviour improved so I wonder if she felt the same. I walked across the work car park the other day with the rain falling on me and thought how nice it was to feel rain.
I’ve been ordering so much stuff online. I sat on the laptop the other night adding things to my basket and my daughter suggested a couple of things and they got added right away. Perhaps not the healthiest way to deal with the situation, but it is what it is.
I went to sleep at 8.30pm one night, and then other nights I’ve still been up at 11pm (unusual for me). Wake up time is mainly between 5am and 6am.
Keeping busy with work is good.
That’s all for now.
Stay safe and stay sane!
