It feels like the start of the end of lockdown.
Things are opening up again, and rules are being relaxed, and even the most vulnerable people are being told they’ll be back to work by August.
And so, lockdown is ending.
Over the last few days, I’ve had these fleeting moments of regret. I’ve felt as though I should have done things differently during lockdown, as though I haven’t used the time properly.
It’s easy to have rose tinted glasses and think that lockdown was actually 3 months of holiday, relaxed time, fun… and it was anything but. It was scary and overwhelming and challenging.
And I have achieved some things:
- Worked. I’ve worked all the way through, every single week day and most weekends have included some work too. My law firm team were sent home on furlough in March and have stayed home on furlough since, and I’ve kept on working. We’ve been hugely blessed that the work has come in week after week. So workload wise, I’ve probably never been more busy, and then I’ve put together things like our risk assessment (thanks C!) and our phased return plan and all of those things to help us ease back to normal over the coming months.
- Childcare AND looking after daughter’s mental wellbeing. Hubby has done more childcare than me because I’ve been working and he hasn’t, but when I’ve been back from work I’ve been trying to be present and fun with my daughter. She’s struggled a huge amount during lockdown and there have been some really challenging days.
- Writing. I finished writing, editing and published one book near the start of lockdown, then put my writing on hold for a while. I’m back writing again now as I have some projects with fixed deadlines.
I most definitely haven’t used lockdown to exercise (other than walking the dog), eat well or renovate the house.
But I’ve done what I’ve done and I guess that’s enough.